I spent a lot of time alone in silence, prayer, and meditation which is something that I rarely did before. One of the most important realizations that I came to was the fact that I had taken my life for granted. I was like the living dead, meandering through life like a Zombie in a trancedental state. I allowed day to day numbing routines of life get in the way of infinite possibilities and greatness. Talents layed dormant and I wasn't living up to my fullest potential. Fighting Cancer forced me to analyze my life and see it for what it really was at the time. It felt wasted.
I promised myself that if I survived this, I would live a full life, so that I will not die empty. I truly believe we are all unique and magnificent in our own individual ways, blessed with gifts that God has appointed us to use for the greatest good. As long as we are living on this Earth, I think that it is up to us to live up to our fullest potential in life, and it is our responsibility not to let those creative gifts go to waste. You don't want to sing the Blues like I did, "I Should have, Would have, and Could have, But Didn't." You never know when that time will come, because that day could be tomorrow. A second chance isn't always guaranteed.
Somewhere along the way, I forgot about the things that made me happy. I was going about life all wrong, and God had to shake things up a little bit. OK, maybe a lot, but it has been worthwhile in the end. Being faced with the possibility of death was definitely one of the most scariest moments in my life, but It forced me to Wake Up and snap out of it. I have so much to offer and more to give. I have 3 beautiful children that I had to think of, and so I had to fight for myself and for them. Life is a precious gift and we have to appreciate every second of it. Remember to never take your life for granted.
These past 7 years have taught me more about life than I have ever learned. It is the hard times that propel you and move you forward so that you can get to a higher place. Determination, Integrity, Humility, & Gratitude are just some of the attributes I have learned along the way. I am motivated to live a healthier life and to do the things that I know I am meant to do. Fighting Cancer has been both the absolute Worst and Best thing that has ever happened to me. Although I suffered a lot, I came out of it stronger and wiser. The valuable lessons that I have learned has given me wisdom worth far more than any dollar amount imaginable.
I read something one day by an amazing author named Wayne Dyer that really stuck with me. It said, "Don't Die with Your Music Still Inside You." When I reflect back on my life I realize It was not the things that I did in my life that I regret, but the things that I did not do. Thankfully, today I sing a different song, and this time my song is called I Will, I Am........ and I have no regrets...
"Nothing can defeat you, if you make up your mind to fight and nothing can save you, if you have accepted defeat."
- Apoorve Dubey
ck here to edit.